Monday, July 31, 2006

To blog, or not to blog, shrug

Saturday night after the girls got to sleep, I had my laptop at home to catch up on some work, so, of course, sat their like a huge potato zombie and clicked through adoption blogs. I can't even remember why or which one was the first one I clicked into, but once you get into them, it's like quick sand, one blog leads to more links, leads to more blogs and more personal information than I thought I ever wanted to know, but apparently, I want to know because I just sat there clicking and reading and clicking and reading for way way way too long.

Some of these folks are very entertaining. They can make me want to read about the fourth diaper bag and gazillionith Baby Gap "drooly" outfit that bought that day. Some aren't so entertaining and I want to say, oh, put a sock in it. I am fascinated by the whole phenomenon. They have audiences, they write to please their audiences, they are pleased when they please their readers, they keep track of comments, they are hurt when no one comments, they know the lingo, they have the time, they respond to email, they make e-friends, they post controversial opinions and don't seem to get offended when they get negative comments, to the contrary they seem to relish the opportunity to lash back, they can manipulate the webhost site with neat things that flash and link video clips. I am too middle-aged, I am unworthy, I cannot keep up with that kind of "competition."

I can report, that's easy enough, when I was in China and observing and regurgitating my thoughts. But I've been home with Nora for over six months and the difficult work of parenting a child you weren't expecting her to be and attaching to that small fully formed and often annoying little human, that is hard, very hard to write about. But, I'm thinking, could writing about it help me accomplish the task better? Would it keep me honest when I slack off, when I'm supposed to be doing my "homework" with Nora, but I just would rather watch reality tv? I'm just wondering out loud because, apparently, that's what people who blog do, they wonder outloud. Let me think about it. Older child adoption is of great interest to a lot of people, I just don't know if I have anything to say that would be helpful, enlightening or comment worthy.