Sunday, October 19, 2008

Pretty much perfection

A wise friend, who I'm sure is not aware of my blog and is too busy for it anyway, peeled off a little piece of advice at our last bookclub meeting that I gamely hosted at my house a couple of weeks ago (one-half hour after I emptied the house of too many 8-year-old Hannah Montaniacs from Mimi's b-day party) which my suave and elegant friends gamely attended and graciously looked past, over and around the dust bunnies big enough to have reserved parking spaces in the hall and the full size cut-out of the aforementioned secret pop star.

I was at my end of the table lamenting work load and loads of laundry and the general penumbra of guilt that comes part and parcel with more than full-time work, full-time house keeping and full-time single parenting (the genuinely single kind without the benefit of monthly support payments, although many may disagree with my definition of genuine because I don't have to deal with the emotional cost of a reviled ex-spouse that may or may not be forthcoming with said support payments and may or may not be poisoning my childrens' minds). My friend, who is a judge and a good parent, very credible and, as I already mentioned, wise) said to me, very directly, well, yeah, there's all that, and there will always be all that, and sometimes more of that, but just concentrate on making one memory a month and call it good.

Well, yesterday, it was good, very, very good, pretty much perfection, and I'm here to wrap it in waxed paper, tie it with string, and call it good.

Another wise mother of my acquaintance, who seems to have come instinctively loaded with the making memories strategy in her parenting quiver, generously shared her inside scoop (get it?) on the top secret pumpkin patch location (yeah, top secret, about 2 miles from where I grew up, who knew? I thought pumpkins came from the front of Albertsons and that was that, well they get to the front of Albertsons from this place). Equipped with empty bladders and warm jackets (you never know what kind of facilities, or lack thereof, one may encounter), we headed North yesterday on a morning that just screams for a cliche: picture perfect. Good heck, mid-October in our great state known world wide for what? oh yeah, snow, and it was dry, warm and so sunny, so really? other than what that damn electoral college does to my vote, what is so wrong with this place? Rhetorical, purely rhetorical, no need to answer.

Last one in the pumpkin patch is a rotten squash.

Wait, we don't need no stinkin' coats, where do you think this is? Utah?

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(Don't know how I just stranded that line of magic code, can't seem to fix it either, oh well)

Come on sis (they call each other sis, is that too much? I love it) let's ditch the little losers, they're slowing down our pumpkin hunting mojo.

Come on sis, let's take the high road and we'll be in Scotland afore ye.

Who you calling loser? Look at us Ma! Top of the World, um, top of the hay bale maze!

So many pumpkins, so litte time. Come on, you knew I had to say it, they're standing in the middle of a big honking pumpkin patch, how could I not say it?

Ellie, cut your hair, we don't get paid when you wear a logo sweatshirt if the logo isn't visible. Go Utes anyways. And that is about the most I can rev up for my alma mater, I so don't get the wearing 'o the red, unless the Utes play the Ys, then, yeah, GO UTES, I can spend a few more capital letters for that.

We learned in school that some eggs have a long incubation period, wait, wrong science unit.

Sis, come look, I found the perfect one, oh, crud, shouldn't have blinked, look sis, I found the other perfect one!

Mom, if I don't get me some help with this cart, your Social Security payments won't be able to even touch my therapy bills.

YuYu, we drove all the way to Farmington for pumpkins, come on, go big or go home, or well, yeah, we'll go home too, but come on little gal, load up, we're in the middle of a big honking pumpkin patch.

Total cheesecake, but did you notice, matching themed $4 t-shirts? I was in it to win it yesterday, they'll remember the matching t-shirts for sure.

Okay, cart is full, time to bring it on home, many hands make light work.

Many hands also make cart crooked.

Okay you amateurs, let the big sis have at it, I'll show you how it's done, although this is my first time in a pumpkin patch too because until today, Mom thought pumpkins came from the front of Albertsons. I feel so cheated, hope Mom's Social Security payments will be enough to cover all the therapy.

Okay, finally, the last 20 yards to the car, Mimi finally pitches in to help. I don't call her the princess of everything for no good reason.

Sorry girls, all sales are final, too late to take any back. Just start lifting, it's only 80 pounds of pumpkins. Put your backs into it, tote those bales.

No really, my hands are full with the camera, just keep lifting, it will be done before you know it, really, trust me, I'm your mother, would I lie to you? oh yeah, well I really thought that pumpkins came from the front of Albertsons.

And despite Mimi's pained expression, a good time was had by all and a good memory was stored in the childhood memory banks, I'm pretty damn sure. One month down, infinity to go.


Anonymous said...

Marji, I hate to tell you this, but based on the fact that we saw them delivering pumpkins TO our local pumpkin patch yesterday, I think Albertsons is where it all begins.


Eliza2006 said...

Looks like a good time! At least you picked a nice weekend...Eliza's pumpkin patch memory this year will be one of rain and wind whipping her in the face! I like the one memory a month's doable. Your kids are living the charmed life over there!


Holly said...

I love this post, Marji! You are a great Mom in so many ways. You show your daughters what it takes to work hard, and also to have fun! You are real. I love this pumpkin patch! You are inspiring me to post mine. XXXOOO, Holly

Kiy said...

Great post! I chuckled along with you, smiled and grinned. What a way to start my morning, thank you so much for sharing your dears! We are going to make our very first pumpkin patch memory on Saturday as last year at this time we were gearing up to go to China for our little dear. I am going to take your friend's sage advice, make a good memory a month and who knows, maybe if we are lucky a few more will sneak in!

Cheers, Kiy (another Fu Mama)

Terynn said...

Alright, this is likely to make you sigh and/or mutter under your breath, but suffer it as best you can and if you can't stand it, have Ellie come up with something for you. lol

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